Last week I was complaining I don't have time (considering the job and baby) to paint anymore. That I'm always so tired.
When I look back at my past when I seemed to have more time, I wonder if I could have worked harder to build a portfolio to sell on istock and really live like that? Be a painter with 10,000 hours under my belt. To have really put 100% into that livelihood goal.
In the future, will I think this was just as good a time to make that happen?
I was watching a doc about abstract expressionist Clyfford Still, and his daughter recalled a time her father told her "I love you kid, but the painting comes first."
When I was single, I went a few years without a tv. Of course I went out quite a bit, but also read a lot more than now. Whenever I was too tired to read, I would sleep. I have an amazing capacity to stay awake and watch tv when too tired to do anything else. It's an unproductive spiral.
Of course I'm not going to be like Still when it comes to making choices between my family and painting, but I can also make better use of my me time. If i'm too tired to paint, then sleep plain and simple.
